Hire Me

Lately I’ve been thinking about finding a part-time job for various assorted reasons. Mainly because it’s difficult to live on one income, still have money left over for fun things and still save or get ahead on bills. I do work from home for my old job but it’s seasonal. Another reason I think I could use a job? My sanity! What sanity, you ask? Exactly! It might be too late!

I have thought of some things I could do. It’s difficult. I could look for a career-type job, but, I didn’t love my career before and I love being home with Bird. And, for us, it did not make sense by the time we paid for daycare and all the other nonsense that went along with having an actual career. And, then there’s the huge part of me being even crazier than I am now…

I want a job I can leave at the door. I just want something to do. I want to make a little extra cash and maybe, just maybe SPEAK TO SOME PEOPLE ON A DAILY BASIS. I was thinking maybe I could get a seasonal job at say, Target or Costco. I love those places! They should hire me! I am a good employee! It’s still difficult because Bread doesn’t get home from work until 6 or later. We’d have to orchestrate a meeting place since probably most later shifts start before six.

I know bars are open late and a great place to talk to people but I don’t see myself working until two am or later, coming home and getting up at six or seven with the tot. No! I will be cranky.

I had a thought! I could baby sit! Wait? But how will this help my crazy? Isn’t this going to perpetuate it? I’m crazy because I stay home trying to entertain my child and now I want to add another child or two into the mix? Yes! I do! I think this would be okay! I will post an add on Craigslist:

Crazy stay-at-home mother of one darling three-year-old girl will watch your child in my smoke-free and, mostly, pet-hair free home (thanks to my need for a clean house and constant need/compulsion to Swiffer). I am college educated and, by some miracle, my child is seemingly intelligent. We have fun! Background check is welcome but I have to tell you about that one thing I did in high school that is probably going to come up when you search for me as it did at my career…I’m really excellent at making fun of myself and even better at making fun of others. I’ll teach your child so many things! Call me!

Yes! Yes! This could work! I really think it could! It will give Bird a playmate until we decide if we want to make another child or not. It will also give said prospective child time to brew and actually grow into a playmate for Bird…There’s that.

All in the matter of this here post I’ve figured out my “situation.” I mean, you’d hire me to watch your kid, right? I’m witty! I’m only slight crazy! Call me! We’ll talk! While this does not exactly solve my inability to speak to adults, it may help in my financial situation. Therefore, I could pay someone to come over and talk to me each day! I am a genius!