Dear Couch,
We were together most of the weekend. You know how this works; I am with you as much as I possibly can be. Sometimes, I have other things to do. You are so good to me. You hold me up so I can rest my weary head. You have allowed me to make an indentation for my ass allowing for optimal viewing of the television. Alas, we can be the best of friends during the colder months of the year but, once the weather gets warmer, I have to back off a little bit.
Please stop calling me. You are making this so much harder than it needs to be. You know I will come back to you; I always do. You are the only furniture in the room with the TV, so it's inevitable. But, please, let me do what needs to be done.
Signed,
Fair-Weather Lounger
P.S. It's definitely not you; it's me.
Jessie,
ReplyDeleteThanks for not farting on me as much as Bread does.